The basic route: court petition or your parent's consent

You obtain power of attorney over a parent in one of two ways. If your parent is mentally capable and willing, they can sign a document giving you authority — this is called a voluntary power of attorney and is the faster path. If your parent cannot or will not consent, you file a petition in probate or family court asking a judge to appoint you as guardian or conservator, which is a court-ordered form of power of attorney. The second route takes weeks to months and requires proof that your parent cannot manage their own affairs.

The specific names and procedures vary by state. Some states use the term "guardian," others use "conservator," and a few use both for different types of decisions. Some states have a middle option called a "limited power of attorney" or "healthcare proxy" that lets you handle only specific matters without full guardianship. Your state's probate court website or your county clerk's office can tell you which form your state uses and what documents you need to file.

Key Takeaways

  • If your parent can sign documents and agrees, a voluntary power of attorney is the fastest and least expensive option, requiring only a notarized signature.
  • If your parent lacks mental capacity or refuses, you must file a guardianship or conservatorship petition in probate court, which requires medical evidence and a court hearing.
  • The specific process and terminology differ by state — check your state probate court or county clerk's office for the exact forms and filing fees.
  • Your parent has the right to contest a guardianship petition, and the court will appoint an attorney to represent them if they cannot afford one.
  • Guardianship and power of attorney are not the same thing; guardianship is court-ordered and covers all decisions, while power of attorney is voluntary and can be limited to specific matters.

Voluntary power of attorney: what your parent needs to sign

If your parent is mentally capable and willing, they can sign a durable power of attorney document that names you as their agent. "Durable" means the document remains valid even if your parent later becomes incapacitated — this is the version you want. Your parent can also sign a healthcare power of attorney (also called a healthcare proxy or medical power of attorney) to give you authority over medical decisions only, and a separate financial power of attorney for money and property matters.

Your parent does not need a lawyer to sign these documents, though having one review them costs $200 to $500 and can prevent mistakes. Many states provide free templates through the state bar association or the state attorney general's office. The document must be notarized — your parent signs it in front of a notary public, who witnesses the signature. Banks, law offices, and some libraries have notaries. Once notarized, the document is valid when ready, though some institutions may ask for a certified copy.

Your parent can revoke a power of attorney at any time by signing a revocation document and notifying you and any institutions that have a copy. If your parent becomes mentally incapacitated and never signed a power of attorney, you cannot create one retroactively — you must go to court.

Guardianship through the court: when your parent cannot consent

If your parent lacks the mental capacity to understand what they are signing, or if they refuse to sign a power of attorney, you file a petition for guardianship (or conservatorship, depending on your state) in the probate court of the county where your parent lives. You will need a doctor's statement or psychiatric evaluation showing that your parent cannot manage their own affairs. The court will review your petition, notify your parent, and usually hold a hearing where a judge decides whether to appoint you.

The filing fee ranges from $200 to $500 depending on the state and county. You will also need to pay for a medical evaluation, which costs $300 to $800. Some counties require you to post a bond — a form of insurance that protects your parent's assets if you misuse them — though judges often waive this for adult children. The entire process typically takes four to twelve weeks from filing to court order.

Your parent has the right to contest the petition. If they cannot afford a lawyer, the court will appoint one. The judge may also appoint a guardian ad litem — an independent person who investigates your parent's condition and reports to the court. This is meant to protect your parent's interests, not to block you, but it does add time and cost.

What you can and cannot do as guardian or agent

Once appointed, you have authority to make decisions about your parent's money, property, healthcare, and living situation — but only the decisions the court order or power of attorney document allows. A full guardianship gives you broad authority. A limited power of attorney might cover only banking and bill payment, leaving your parent to make healthcare decisions themselves. Read your court order or power of attorney document carefully to know your exact scope.

You are legally required to act in your parent's best interest, not your own. You cannot take their money for yourself, sell their house to benefit you, or make decisions that harm them. You must keep records of any money you spend on their behalf and be ready to show a court or bank where the money went. If you are a full guardian, you may need to file annual accountings with the court showing all income and expenses.

Some decisions are off-limits even for guardians. You cannot change your parent's will, vote on their behalf, or make decisions about their marriage or adoption. If your parent has a living will or advance healthcare directive, you must follow it even if you disagree with it.

Differences between states and when to hire a lawyer

Power of attorney law varies significantly by state. Some states have a single "power of attorney" form that covers all decisions; others require separate documents for healthcare and finances. Some states let you file guardianship petitions online; others require paper filing in person. A few states have a supported decision-making option, where your parent keeps legal authority but you help them make decisions — this is less restrictive than guardianship and available in only a handful of states.

If your parent is wealthy, owns property in multiple states, or has complex finances, hiring a lawyer is worth the cost. A probate attorney can file the guardianship petition correctly, handle any contests, and set up the accounting system you will need. Expect to pay $1,500 to $3,000 for a straightforward guardianship case. If your situation is straightforward — your parent is willing to sign a power of attorney, or you are filing an uncontested guardianship in a state with clear procedures — you may be able to do it yourself using state forms and a notary.

Your state bar association's website lists probate lawyers in your area. Many offer a free initial consultation. Your county clerk's office can also direct you to the probate court and tell you whether your state has a self-help center that walks you through the process.

What happens after the court appoints you

Once you have a court order or signed power of attorney, you present it to banks, insurance companies, healthcare providers, and other institutions to prove your authority. Most will ask for a certified copy of the document. Some will ask you to fill out their own form confirming your authority. Keep copies of the order or document in a safe place and give certified copies to anyone who needs to see it.

If you are a full guardian, you become responsible for managing your parent's day-to-day life — deciding where they live, what medical care they receive, how their money is spent. This is a significant responsibility. You may need to hire a home health aide, arrange for assisted living, or manage their medical appointments. You are not required to provide money out of your own pocket; you use your parent's assets to pay for their care.

If your parent's condition changes — they recover capacity, or their needs increase — you can ask the court to modify or end the guardianship. If you can no longer serve, you can ask the court to appoint someone else. When your parent dies, the guardianship ends automatically.

Frequently Asked Questions

Can my parent revoke a power of attorney after I have it?

Yes, if they are mentally capable. They can sign a revocation document and give it to you and any institutions that have a copy. If they become incapacitated, they cannot revoke it. A court-ordered guardianship can only be ended or modified by the court, not by your parent alone.

What if my parent has dementia but still refuses to sign a power of attorney?

You file a guardianship petition in probate court. You will need a doctor's statement that your parent lacks capacity to make financial or healthcare decisions. The court will hold a hearing and decide whether to appoint you. Your parent can contest it, but if the medical evidence is clear, the court usually grants the petition.

Do I need a lawyer to file for guardianship?

Not always. If the guardianship is uncontested — your parent does not object, and there are no other family members fighting for control — you can file the petition yourself using your state's forms. If your parent contests it or the situation is complex, a lawyer is worth hiring to represent you in court.

How much does power of attorney cost?

A voluntary power of attorney costs $0 to $500 depending on whether you use a free template or hire a lawyer to draft it. Guardianship through the court costs $500 to $1,500 in filing fees, medical evaluations, and court costs, plus $1,500 to $3,000 if you hire a lawyer.

Can I be paid for being my parent's guardian?

You are not automatically paid, but you can ask the court for compensation from your parent's assets if managing their affairs is a significant job. The court decides whether the amount is reasonable. If your parent has little money, the court may deny the request.